Regrettable statistic for SOS domestic violence calls received

Regrettable statistic for SOS domestic violence calls received

Breaking the Silence on Post-Separation Violence:

A startling rise in the number of help calls to SOS Domestic Violence has been reported for the past year, with a staggering 60,714 requests received between April 1, 2024, and March 31, 2025. This number surpasses their previous records and has been steadily climbing since 2018.

Claudine Thibaudeau, who manages cases related to the issue at SOS Domestic Violence, expresses, "This is our biggest year ever."

Oftentimes, people fail to recognize or downplay the gravity of post-separation violence - a concerning phenomenon that can result in tragic outcomes.

A woman named Elizabeth, a victim of post-separation violence, corroborates this claim. Sadly, her story is not unique; post-separation violence frequently crops up as a major concern among victims, according to SOS Domestic Violence.

"Post-separation violence is a series of actions where the partner continues to exert control despite the separation," explains Claudine Thibaudeau. She shares that violence typically doesn't end with a breakup, but rather evolves into new, insidious forms.

Along with Elizabeth, her ex-partner Étienne, and their four children, all under the age of 13, have been incessantly entangled in the judicial processes behind their divorce.

Étienne consistently challenges the conditions imposed on him by Youth Protection, making it difficult for Elizabeth to move forward. The victim's tireless efforts to ensure the conditions are followed further delay her divorce proceedings and weigh heavily on her mental state.

"He keeps pushing, creating a never-ending series of obstacles," laments Elizabeth. "I feel exhausted."

Leveraging Children as a Weapon

Under court orders, Étienne is allowed one-hour, supervised visits with his children per week. However, he persistently defies the rules and attempts to manipulate his children against their mother.

On one occasion, he presented his sons with bags of clothes, telling them, "This is dad's stuff because mom kicked him out of the house." The devastating consequences of these actions left Elizabeth feeling emotionally drained.

"It's enough to make one exhausted," comments Louise Riendeau, who handles political files at the Regroupement des maisons d'hébergement pour femmes victimes de violence conjugale. She stresses the widespread occurrence of post-separation violence.

Defiant partners who disrupt court orders and use twisted tactics to maintain control over their victims are more likely to pose a threat, concludes Louise Riendeau.

She encourages family law lawyers, school staff, and sports personnel to educate themselves on these potentially dangerous behaviors. Be watchful for subtle signs that may appear insignificant on their own but collectively paint a troubling picture.

Prolonging divorce procedures to rack up lawyer fees is a common tactic, asserts Louise Riendeau. Abusive partners adapt their strategies to maximize their influence, using children as a vulnerable pawn in this deadly game.

Making the Difference

It's acceptable for someone to feel hurt or upset after a relationship ends, but how does one distinguish between normal reactions and post-separation violence?

"The key is to recognize the difference between a context where there was no violence and a context where there was," says Claudine Thibaudeau.

Consider a woman who leaves her abusive husband. A few weeks later, her ex-spouse becomes her son's sports coach. To the outside world, his involvement may seem heartwarming, but remains a form of violence to the woman since his presence threatens her safety.

Another example given by Claudine Thibaudeau involves a husband who, despite being unrepresented in court, makes progress in the divorce case, causing financial distress for his ex-wife through exorbitant lawyer fees.

Claudine Thibaudeau suggests that subsidizing divorce procedures in cases of domestic violence could help alleviate the issue and ensure a more equitable process. "We can't predict in which situations it will escalate. We must believe a victim when she expresses her fears. Her instinct is worth something."

Facing the Uncertainty

Tomorrow, Étienne might snap and physically harm Elizabeth. This unsetting possibility constantly plagues her mind. She lives in a state of hypervigilance and has installed a comprehensive surveillance system at her home for added security.

When reading articles about femicides, Elizabeth sees herself in the 'before' stages. "It's like we know the signs, but we're not doing enough," she admits.

Armed with an alarm system and a 'panic button' linked directly to the emergency services, Elizabeth remains on high alert, constantly waiting for the next move.

Understanding the Invisible Line:Post-separation violence, while striving to resume control over the victim, unfolds in varied forms such as physical abuse, emotional manipulation, stalking, and financial coercion. Recognizing the warning signs, curbing the impact, and taking positive actions are crucial to ensure the safety and mental well-being of individuals. As a society, we must be better equipped to identify and respond to post-separation violence.

1. Elizabeth's story, a victim of post-separation violence, serves as a stark reminder of the tragic outcomes that can result from downplaying its gravity.
2. SOS Domestic Violence reports that post-separation violence is a major concern for many victims, with the number of help calls received steadily increasing since 2018.
3. Claudine Thibaudeau explains that post-separation violence is a series of actions where the partner continues to exert control despite the separation, often evolving into new, insidious forms.
4. Étienne, Elizabeth's ex-partner, consistently defies court orders and attempts to manipulate his children against their mother, leveraging them as a weapon in his never-ending series of obstacles.
5. Louise Riendeau encourages family law lawyers, school staff, and sports personnel to educate themselves on these potentially dangerous behaviors, as abusive partners adapt their strategies to maximize their influence.
6. Claudine Thibaudeau suggests subsidizing divorce procedures in cases of domestic violence as a means to alleviate the issue and ensure a more equitable process.
7. Elizabeth, living in a state of hypervigilance due to the unsetting possibility of future violence, has installed a comprehensive surveillance system at her home for added security.
8. As a society, it's crucial to be better equipped to identify and respond to post-separation violence, taking positive actions to ensure the safety and mental well-being of individuals, especially in the areas of health-and-wellness, mental-health, mens-health, and womens-health, and providing support in parenting, general-news, and crime-and-justice.

Read also: